Everything looks bad (tradução - Tudo mal)

Has it ever happened to you that everything u do looks bad? That nothing we say or do is what should, and that we only screw up? To me it has. It is as if nothing is good when out of my mouth! Anything I say, anything I do is crap. It's frustrating. I let down and hurt everyone. And it hurts. It hurts a lot, and I don't know what to do anymore to improve the situation! I'm sick of it! I try, I try to breathe deeply, try to say it calmly, but not even then it goes well. It seems that I'm unable to explain myself or make myself understood. It's really frustrating.
And the others also want everything their way, but I can't please everyone! There are also things that are new to me, I'm a little disoriented, confused and FRIGHTENED even! And I think that's normal. I'm not perfect, but sometimes I think I'm not much of anything. I wish someone would stop me. I wish someone understood me. I wish someone would help me. I'm frustrated, there. ; _;

Tudo parece mal

Já vos aconteceu parecer que fazem tudo mal? Que nada do que dizem ou fazem é o que devia, e que só fazem porcaria? A mim já. É como se nada estivesse bem quando sai da minha boca! Só digo, só faço asneira. É frustrante. Desiludo e magoo todos. E dói. Dói imenso, e não sei o que fazer mais para melhorar a situação! Estou farta disto! Eu tento, tento respirar fundo, tento dizer com calma, mas nem assim sai bem. Parece que não me consigo explicar nem fazer entender. É mesmo frustrante.
E os outros também querem tudo à maneira deles, mas eu não consigo agradar em tudo. Também há coisas que são novas para mim, estou um pouco desorientada, confusa e ASSUSTADA! E acho que é normal. Não sou perfeita, mas às vezes penso que não sou é nada de nada. Quem me dera que alguém me parasse. Quem me dera que alguém me entendesse. Quem me dera que alguém me ajudasse. Estou frustrada prontos. ;_;

A way to imagine

Well guys this is part of a story I wrote a long time ago, there might be some mistakes so bear with me. Hope you enjoy it :3


-       Wait!! Stop! Please!!
     She ran to stop him, but couldn’t reach him. Suddenly he was gone. He just disappeared into thin air. After everything she had been through... It was all for nothing...
-       I failed...
     And she stood there... in the rain... crying... waiting for a sign.
-       It really is impossible... I can’t do this... I can’t....
-       You’re right... Who needs this world? Who cares about all these humans? I don’t, you don’t, who does? No one...
-       Who’s there?! Who are you, or what are you?
-       You’re just go’nna give up?
-       What else can I do?! I failed! Now it won’t make a difference..
-       Are you sure of that? Are you absolutely sure of that? Everyone worked hard... for your sake...
-       What can I do?!
     She cried and cried and cried, until she finally realized that if she doesn’t do it no one will.  If she gives up, then all the work that every single person who helped her throughout her journey had, would be in vain. Her own work would be for nothing and all the sacrifices she made so that light would remain in all being’s hearts... It would all be for nothing... It would all mean nothing…
-       No... I can’t give up! Neither now nor ever! Not after all this! I... won’t... ever... give uuuuup!!!
     A huge power was released. The rain immediately stopped. The cars, the people… they all disappeared. A blinding light appeared and she was teleported to a strange, although beautiful place... 
-       What ...?! Where am I??
-       Hello! So you’re finally here?! Great!
-       You!! But how?!
     You’re probably thinking “What kind of beginning is this?!” Well it isn’t. It is but a memory… Let me start from the real beginning:
     A long, long time ago there was a battle, a historical battle that is still at hand. No one knows and everyone knows about its existence. I am talking about the long fight between both light and darkness.
     Yes I know, it’s a myth, a legend, a story told to kids. Or so I thought. The truth is: it’s no myth, no legend and no fairy tale either, it’s the real deal.
     Sophie, a 16 year old girl was on her summer vacation. She was an average girl, neither good nor bad. Her life was so typical: hang out with friends, go to the beach, go to the movies and the most exciting thing she had done was passing from her old house to a bigger one, what meant a lot of cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning. So yes, her life was quite boring. I mean, until that day… or should I say night...

     Sophie was supposed to be asleep at 3 a.m. but she wasn’t. She was reading a fantastic book. This book she had found on the street earlier that day right in front of her house, in the garden by her favorite flowers. It was about that legend, the battle between light and darkness.

     When mom or dad woke up in the middle of the night she would close the book and turn off her flashlight pretending to be asleep. That night she was waiting to be sure they were asleep when she heard a noise from her window. Seeing that she was turned against the wall she waited a bit then, turned to see what it was. Nothing... There was nothing abnormal there. Everything was right where it was supposed to be.

-       Ok, I’m getting too inside the book. I’ll finish it tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow! For now I’m going to sleep...
     She turned again towards the wall and tried to sleep.
     When it was nice and quiet she heard that same noise again. It was like a lion’s roar or better yet a cat’s purr.
     Curious, she turned on the flashlight and saw a shadow, looking like a cat. It ran through the door and went downstairs. Of course she followed it while being extremely careful not to wake up anyone at the house.
     Downstairs, near the exit door was where the shadow stopped. She pointed the flashlight at it and then she saw that it was a real cat with white fur and a red scarf around his neck.
-       A cat? What’s cat doing here? How did you get in?

     The cat jumped to the window and that’s when she saw someone left it opened. The cat looked at her and she felt like she should follow him.

     She opened the door silently and got out to the garden looking for that strange looking cat.
-       I must be out of my mind to be following a cat! Oh well... Here kitty kitty...
     A cat appeared right in front of her but it wasn’t the cat from before. This one had orange fur and a yellow scarf instead. In one paw he had a brown mark of some sort, shaped like a bolt.
     This cat didn’t send a friendly feeling like the other one, the beautiful one, with the white fur. He had somewhat of a rough look.
-       Eh? Another cat?!
-       Yes why? What where you expecting? An owl?
-       I wasn’t expecting anything... It’s 3 a.m., Hello! Wait...YOU CAN TALK???
-       You don't say! Tenkai, is she really the one we are looking for?! She is dumb as hell!!
-       HEEEY!! I am not that dumb, you little...
-       She is indeed.
   The other cat reappeared in front of her again. His soft fur looked like a fluffy cloud, which made her desire to poke him bigger.


(to be continued)